Your Husband is Your Friend, Accept Him.

A man needs to be accepted as he is, just exactly as he is. This kind of all-out acceptance convinces him you really love him. His need for total acceptance isn’t so strange; I need to feel accepted too. Don’t you? Doesn’t everyone? You don’t marry a man with intention of changing him. It won’t work.

Nagging is the opposite of accepting. If you have the habit, you know it’s a hard one to kick. Nip it in the bud by admitting verbally what you’re doing. You’ll find that once you accept your husband, you’ll no longer need to nag. Just that thought alone may send him into ecstasy! One wife who kicked the habit after eighteen years reported, “The most amazing thing has happened. His faults really don’t bother me. They’re not my concern now. I just concentrate on his good points and I love him so much more than I ever did before.” Acceptance is The Answer

Your husband is what he is. Accept him as that. This principle is as old as life itself. God accepts us as we are. Even though we don’t deserve it, he still loves us. He has no angle. His love is unconditional. Because He accepts us, through His power we can love and accept others, including our husbands.

First of all, the Bible says that wives should love their husbands. If you’ve lost the love for your husband, why not ask God to restore it? Secondly, if you want your marriage to succeed, you must choose to accept him, knowing that your relationship will probably not improve if you don’t. The choice is yours-you can choose to either go on living with resentment or accept your husband.

Some women don’t nag verbally, but their non accepting vibrations communicate loud and clear. With heaving sighs over the kitchen sink, the martyr silently nurses her woes. “I do accept my husband,” she thinks. “I’ve been putting up with his faults for years without saying a word, but he’ll never change. I won’t say anything. I’ll just carry on for the sake of the children.” GOOD NEWS FOR YOU!

Tolerance is not acceptance. Your tolerance only makes your husband feel incomplete and unworthy. He can sense when he’s not being accepted, and is not able to love you fully. Your husband needs your acceptance most of all during his times of apparent failure. If he’s already low, don’t put him down further. Never compare him with another man. And remember, he’ll never confide in you if he feels that you are being critical or are trying to change him. Life is too short to dwell on another’s weaknesses. Concentrate on his strengths.

Your man needs to feel important, loved, and accepted. If you won’t accept his idiosyncrasies, who will? A wise woman caters to her man’s special quirks, whether it is in salads, sex, or sports. She makes his home his haven, a place to which he can run. She allows him that priceless luxury of unqualified acceptance.

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Time Management for Stay at Home Moms.

When Charles M. Schwab was president of Bethlehem Steel he confronted Ivy Lee, a management consultant, with an unusual challenge: “show me a way to get more things done,” he demanded. “If it works, I’ll pay anything with reason.” Lee handed Schwab a piece of paper. “Write down the things you have to do tomorrow,” he said. Schwab did it. “The first thing tomorrow morning,” Lee instructed, “start working on number one and stay with it until it is completed. Next take number two and don’t go any further until it is completed. Then proceed to number three, and so on. If you can’t complete everything on schedule, don’t worry. At least you will have taken care of the most important things before getting distracted by items of lesser consequence.

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“The secret is to do this daily,” continued Lee. “Evaluate the relative importance of the things you have to get done, establish priorities, record your plan of action and stick to it. Do this every working day. After you have convinced yourself of the value of this system, have your men try it. Test it as long as you like. Then send me a check for whatever you think the idea is worth.” In a few weeks Charles Schwab sent Ivy Lee a check for twenty-five thousand dollars. Schwab later said that this lesson was the most profitable one he had ever learned in his business career.

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If it works for a steel factory, it will work in you house factory. This plan is your for the taking. Free! You’ll have more time, you’ll accomplish much more, and you’ll be available for your husband. If your husband came home in the next ten minutes, what would he see? Look around right now. Are the cabinet doors open? Are there toys strewn from one end of the house to the other? Are there dirty dishes still in the sink and a vacuum cleaner in the living room? Don’t despair. Here’s how you can have it looking fit for a king and keep it that way, with precious time left over just for you.

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Manage Your Time and Safe Your Marriage

The typical housewife begins each day with every good intention. As soon as her husband and kids are out the door, she nobly faces the disaster areas. She begins to think what to do first? The dishes, the beds, the ironing? The groceries, the errands, the car pool? In the midst of this entire trauma, the phone rings. This morning it’s a friend who is having trouble with her husband. Listening to twenty minutes of a tale of woe colors her own situation.

Confronting her own mess, she throws up her hands in despair. The morning is half gone and she thinks, “What’s the use?” Depressed, she pours herself another cup of coffee. She now has several choices for the rest of the day. She may whine, play the martyr, or escape with her box of bonbons to her favorite soap opera. When the kids come home at three o’clock, she screams at them because she’s mad at herself.

A doctor’s wife stopped by recently to discuss this very problem, which she seems to encounter every afternoon. Her husband diagnosed it as “the 4:30, 4:30, syndrome.” “Each afternoon at approximately 4:30 she said, “I drag myself to the kitchen and think, “what, oh what, shall I fix for dinner tonight?’” Her symptoms were rather predictable. First, she peeks into the freezer, wishing that her entrée could thaw miraculously. Next, she shuffles through the chicken and tuna fish in the cupboard, knowing either of these dishes would rate an “Ugh” from her husband.

Frustrated, she gathers the kids into the car, fights the five o’clock traffic to the store, and returns home with a headache and a pound of hamburger. By the time her husband enters the scene, she’s had it. She’s too tired to be available to him. She blames him for her mundane existence and takes her frustrations out in other activities. At tem o’clock she calls her girl friend and talks for forty-five minutes while her husband sits watching TV. Whenever he makes the first suggestive move toward her, she starts a new project of cleaning or sewing.

Her husband feels lonely and bewildered inside and thinks, “She doesn’t want to be with me anymore.” Feeling rejected, he acts aloof or grouchy, or sometimes just heads to bed as a protection. Perhaps you’re like many women who say, “I’m sorry, I can’t be available. I have seven kids, four car pools, and I’m overworked.” I have known bitted and frazzled housewives who have been transformed into calm and gentle complete women! By managing the time, you too can beat the 4:30 syndrome.

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